In this week’s Ask Pulse column, we’re addressing a troubling relationship question from Lade, who is grappling with a situation involving physical abuse and multiple red flags.
A few months ago, while visiting my boyfriend, there was a commotion at his door involving a woman claiming he was the father of her child. He denied it, blaming his cousin, who subsequently fled. The situation was resolved with the woman receiving monthly support from him.
Despite this, our relationship has worsened. I discovered messages on Facebook where he pressured a woman for explicit videos and had inappropriate chats with others. We were planning our marriage, but he continually made excuses.
On Easter Sunday, he slapped me twice after I was on a call with a male friend. Although I ended things, I took him back after his apologies. Recently, on his birthday, he ignored my calls and acted dismissively.
I love him deeply, but I’m unsure about continuing this relationship. What should I do?
Lade
Dear Lade,
Love can indeed cloud judgment, making us overlook serious issues. However, trust is crucial in any relationship. His repeated dishonesty and cheating have already broken that trust.
Violence is never acceptable. Once someone resorts to physical abuse, it often recurs. A relationship’s value isn’t measured by its duration but by the respect and care it offers.
It’s essential to prioritize your well-being. If he’s shown a pattern of abusive behavior and broken promises, it’s important to consider your safety and happiness.